How to KEEP Your Church FROM Vitality & Fruitfulness

There are conferences, seminars, articles, books, curricula telling us how to grow a church. It’s high time the other side of the issue be considered. While I don’t guarantee these easy-to-apply steps will always keep your church from health and vitality, they will, with proper application, certainly increase the chances of stagnation.

1. Change Pastors Every Few Years.

This will assure that no pastor gets too much “power.” It will also discourage members from committing to any long-term goals or growth efforts. And those brought into the church by the pastor’s personal ministry will feel insecure because “their” pastor may not stay more than a couple of years.

2. Don’t Allow New People to Serve.

This applies particularly to those who have never been a church member before, or who were recently converted. These people tend to identify strongly with the group from which they came and offer many unwanted suggestions for reaching others from those groups. By insisting that they serve a proper and lengthy “probationary period” before participating in church decision-making, they can be stalled until they lose their enthusiasm and relationships with the un-churched.  Once this happens, THEN they can be used for church work.

3. Split Up Small Groups & Ministry Teams Regularly.

This will greatly frustrate the people who are most active in the church. They won’t have a chance to build and strngthen meaningful relationships; and they will not develop any deep sense of belonging, ownership, or empowerment.

4. Try to Reach Only People in ‘Stable’ Situations.

Since people are often more responsive to the Gospel following geographic, social, vocational, or life-situational changes, concentrate on people in stable circumstances to minimize contacts with the kind of people that often lead to responsiveness and change.

5. Don’t Send Your Pastor to Conferences or Encourage Him to Read Books on Evangelism & Mission.

If he insists on attending such a workshop, make sure no other church leaders go with him. Enthusiasm for outreach and mission can be easily squelched as long as the pastor is the only one who gets enthused.

6. Emphasize “Quality not Quantity.”

This one almost always works!

Make it sound like the people who want to see new people join the church are playing the ‘numbers game’.  The myth that numerical growth automatically and spontaneously comes as a result of spiritual growth – without actual outreach and evangelism – is believed by many, so take advantage of it. 

Also, point to unmet needs of your own people as the only real concern of the church, and the primary concerns for the pastor.

7. Don’t Be Friendly to Visitors.

If this seems too extreme, be friendly to them at first - THEN ignore them! Don’t visit them.  Don’t invite them to church activities.  Don’t talk to them during the week. Above all: DON’T become friends with them!

8. Don’t Invite People to Visit or Join Your Church.

 We can justify this by saying: “We don’t want to force church membership on anybody.”   To neighbors and guests it says: “You don’t belong here.”  But that’s all we need. 

One variable to this is to allow the pastor to be the only one to do the inviting and relationship building.

 9. Try to Reach Everyone In Your Community the Same Way.

Ignore racial, social, economic, linguistic, and cultural differences. Assume all people are like you – or they should be. 

A  church out to “reach everybody”, without considering even subtle cultural differences, using the same old strategies used in the past, often reaches nobody. Churches are effective when they recognize these distinctions, and develop relevent strategies to serve the different segments of their community.

If you don’t want to grow, don’t aim at a target.

 10. Make Growth Entirely Dependent on the Holy Spirit.

 This not only encourages prayerlessness and evangelistic laziness on our part, but it gives us a convenient excuse if growth doesn’t occur.  We can always blame God.

 11. Don’t Staff & Don’t Budget for Outreach & Mission.

Our resources are precious and limited. Staff and budget for Christian Education, Youth Ministries, etc. first.  Staff and budget for outreach & mission ONLY after these priorities are perfectly met.

 12. Insist on Using Evangelistic Methods That Were Used During the ‘Good Old Days’.

 Don’t consider methods that God may be using today.  Stick with crusades, simplistic tracts, and answering questions no one is asking.

By all means avoid meeting actual needs.  A church that adresses the needs of the poor – like Jesus & Paul said we should – might be accused of Liberalism and promoting a Social Gospel.

13. Don’t Set Goals.

Say that goals produce frustration. Discourage measurement of any kind. Label statistical analysis as ‘worldly’. If that fails, label it ’demonic and destructive’.   Though that may be unfair, and UNTRUE, it will certainly discourage goal-setting and statistical analysis as a diagnostic tool.

 14. Say that God Doesn’t Want the Church to Grow.

 Though this statement may be false, you can dig up enough proof-texts to make it seem believable.

 15. Don’t Advertise Your Church.

 Any advertising should be avoided. Especially don’t let newcomers to your community know where your church is, when services are held, and what ministries might be most beneficial to them.

If you must advertise, put the ad on the church page where only those already churched are likley to see it. And put a picture of the pastor or the building on it, not something that would be of interest to anyone outside your church. And never put a picture of people enjoying themselves together in Christ. Never promote something that might connect with the un-Churched.

 16. Don’t Pray for Kingdom Advancement.

 Pray for people in hospitals and on sick lists. Pray for “spiritual blessings”.  Pray for missions, in general. Not specific prayers for missionaries. Not prayers informed about the challenges missionaries face in their particular locations and work. Pray only for people who you will never meet.  Pray only for people to be healed.  NEVER pray for unchurched neighbors and friends. NEVER pray for God to change you and/or your church to become more godly.

***

This post is satirical and sarcastic.  I have edited and adapted it from a chapter titled: 17 Way to Keep Your Church from Gowing.  from a bookby Mike Grogan, then-pastor of the Bethel Friends Church in Poland, OH.  I don’t recall the title of the book.

That’s Christmas

The resounding cry of this season seems to be: “Remember what Christmas is about.”   I think I’ve heard people say that, and seen people write and post that, and similar sentiments, more this year than ever before. At least, I am aware of it more this year.  And I concur.

The above video, from the UK, takes us through the wide range of perspectives people have about this holiday, and presents the viewer with a penetrating proposition: Christmas is about Jesus – God becoming man, miraculously conceived in and born of a virgin, to remove all the guess-work from quizical and philosophical minds about what God is like and how God feels about humanity.  It is the first observable stage of God’s plan to redeem humanity and reconcile with those that had rebelled against him and neglected to give him the honor he is due.

Christmas is not really about time with the family. It is certainly not about the gifts.  It is not about a quiet day. It’s certainly not about the hubub that leads up to it.  It is a time to be still and know that God is God, and he has made his dwelling among us, to deliver his people from a bondage of our own making. It is a time for reflection.  (See Psalm 46.10; John 1.14)  Above all it is a time to worship the God who is able and who was willing to do this for us.

In short, Christmas really points to something more. To paraphrase one writer: Christmas is God’s Good News – BUT only because we know the story of Easter.   

So to all who want to remember the meaning of Christmas: Happy Easter!

Averting Worship Wars

There are many fights in churches these days over what kind of music to use, but I am convinced most of those fights could be avoided if we faithfully reflected upon the questions given to us by [Colossians 3.12-17].  Instead of asking what kind of music will appeal to the world around us, we must ask:

• What will enable us most deeply to dwell in God’s Word?
• What will best express the Word?
• How will the Word’s beauty and mystery, its infinity and generosity be best conveyed?

- Marva Dawn, A Royal “Waste” of Time

We Wish You a Merry X-mas

I knew better. I should have gone with my first instinct. But I didn’t.

Several Decembers ago I was summoned for jury duty in Walker County, Georgia.  Overhearing other prospective jurors engaged in various religious and low-level theological debates, I vowed to myself to remain quiet and not get involved in these discussions.  For most of the morning I kept to my plan.

Not long before lunch my opinion was solicited by the ring-leader of the discussion group – an un-schooled, self-proclaimed Baptist “preacher”.  Apparently he had taken note earleir in the day when a judge made mention that I was a Presbyterian minister. 

 ”Do you believe in the doctine of Once-Saved-Always-Saved?”

Trying to minimize my words, I replied:

“I believe most of what you mean by that, though I am not comfortable calling it by that name.”

“What do you mean?”, he asked.

“I believe the Bible teaches eternal security for the believer. I just think that describing the doctrine as you did a moment ago leaves an impression of cheap grace.”

I am not sure he understood what I was actually saying, but apparently he was satisfied. He even seemed to sense a kindred spirit. He nodded his head approvingly. 

Then he asked:

“Why d’ya think so many people deny this doctrine?” 

Here is where I started down the wrong road:

“I suspect because people don’t bother to read the one source that defines doctrinal positions (- the Bible)”, I replied a little too flippantly and smuggly. 

Again, my answer apparently satisfied him. Again he nodded his approval.  Then he observed:

“Yep. People are tryin’ to take God and his Word out of ev’ry-thang. It’s just like people tryin’ to take Christ out’a Christmas.  Santa Claus instead’a  Jesus.  And all these signs that say Merry X-mas…  They’re tryin’ to X-out Jesus.”

(Here is the height of my error. Having been lulled into feeling comfortable by the eager reception of my previous simplistic responses…)  I interjected:

“O, no. That is not x-ing out Jesus from Christmas. The letter “X” is the symbol of Christ, taken from the  Greek letter “Chi”, the first letter for Christ in Greek.”

Silence, followed by a shaking head instead of a nodding noggin. Finally, still shaking his head, he told me:

“You are educated beyond usefulness“

Then he walked away.

Like I said, I should have stuck with my original plan. I should have remained quiet, done my time, and gone home.  But since I didn’t, I guess I had it coming.

This old memory came to mind when I read a post by R.C. Sproul on the Ligonier blog: Why is X Used?  I am glad to have someone of Sproul’s stature covering my back. But two new questions come to mind:

• What are the chances that guy will read Sproul’s post?
• Where were you, R.C., on that day years ago?!

Pure As the Driven Snow

I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who enjoys “old” snow – you know, the snow that has been around a few day, has blackened from plowing, is choppy from people playing in the yard.  I know that’s not the type of snow my duaghter enjoys looking at.

After the snowstorm this past Friday night, that dumped 3/4 of a foot all around us, my daughter was concerned that her brothers “messed up” the yard. She likes looking at the pure smoothe snow, untouched by human hand – or boot. 

That started me thinking. There is a methaphor there somewhere.

I think we all have have an innate appreciation for the beauty of purity. Unfortunately, because of our sin, purity does not seem to last long in this life. Sometimes it is corrupted and turns black and ugly. Sometimes it is just messed up by us as we go about our work and play.  But fleeting as it is, while it is here it is something to behold.

This all reminds me that God is on a mission, not simply to “save” a bunch of individuals but, to restore and recreate that which has been corrupted and messed-up.  As beautiful and peaceful as it is to look at the pure snow on the pastures outside my living room window, a beauty is coming that is both incomparable and incorruptable. And that will really be something to see.

Ecstasy & Delight

Ecstasy and delight are essential to the believer’s soul and they promote sanctification.

We were not meant to live without spiritual exhilaration, and the Christian who goes for a long time without the experience of heart-warming will soon find himself tempted to have his emotions satisfied from earthly things and not, as he ought, from the Spirit of God. The soul is so constituted that it craves fulfillment from things outside itself and will embrace earthly joys for satisfaction when it cannot reach spiritual ones…

The believer is in spiritual danger if he allows himself to go for any length of time without tasting the love of Christ and savoring the felt comforts of a Savior’s presence. When Christ ceases to fill the heart with satisfaction, our souls will go in silent search of other lovers…

By the enjoyment of the love of Christ in the heart of a believer, we mean an experience of the “love of God shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given to us” (Romans 5.5)… because the Lord has made himself accessible to us in the means of grace, it is our duty and privilege to seek this experience from Him in these means till we are made the joyful partakers of it.

- John Flavel (1630-1691)

Lost in Wonder, Love, and Praise

 

Surely one of the greatest problems of our times is that we have become so nonchalent about the Lord of the cosmos.  Certainly if we were more immersed in God’s splendor we would find ourselves thoroughly “lost in wonder, love, and praise”.  With all the amazing sights and sounds of our cyberspace world, however, many of us no longer recognize that if we but catch a glimpse of GOD – the imperial Lord of the cosmos, the almighty King of the universe – we will be compelled to fall on our faces.  Our awareness of God’s absolute otherness would give us the sense that we could die now because we have seen God.  We would shout with the prophet: “Woe is me, for I am annihilated”. (Isaiah 6.5; Martin Luther’s rendering.)

- Marva Dawn, A Royal “Waste” of Time

What is Was Was Football

In this classic comedy, from 1953, Andy Griffith describes his first encounter with the great American game of football.

2009 Heisman Trophy

 

For the first time in years there is no clear cut candidate who will win the Heisman Trophy. For that reason alone the race is interesting. And for the first time in years I may be seeing glimmers of hope restored in my attitude. 

Like other sports fans, I have my opinions each year.  Sometimes my opinion matches that of the “experts”. But even then it is not enough to override the disappoitments of years when the results seem to be a sham; when it appears the fix is in; when networks like ESPN have more to do with choosing the winner than players’ performances on the field do. 

But I am hopeful this year will be different.

Below are my top 5 picks, with number 1 being who I would have voted for had I been given a vote.  I know that some of my choices can’t win - not all were even invited to the party in New York. But that doesn’t matter. These are my slections:

1. Ndamukong Suh - DT – Nebraska – Senior

A dominant player in the trenches; the best player in the country this year. PERIOD.  And in this year when there is no clear cut QB or RB, a defensive lineman can win.  (I know a defensive player was once given the trophy, but this time Suh should legitimately “win” it.)

Watch the video: Suh

2. Toby Gerhart - RB – Stanford – Senior

It was tough not voting for Gerhart. He is equally deserving for both his stats and his style.

3. Mark Ingram - RB – Alabama – Sophomore

It is hard to believe no Tide player has ever won the Heisman.  Ingram may go home with it. If he does, there is no injustice, he is a great back.  But I wouldn’t give it to him this year.

4. Tony Pike - QB – Cincinnati – Senior

While it is over used hyperbole, Pike is the driving force behind the Bearcats’ undefeated season.  His backup played well in periods Pike was injured, but without Pike Cincinnati would be good but not great. 

5. Colt McCoy - QB – Texas – Senior

The Maxwell Award winner should have won the Heisman last year.  His numbers were down a little, but McCoy’s performances still shined.  He has Texas playing again for the National Championship.

The Christ of Christmas

The WORD

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning.  Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.  In him was life, and that life was the light of men.  The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us.     - John 1.1-4, 14a

This Christ of Christmas shines down through the ages like a gem with many facets. Each facet (or Hebrew name) reveals a different aspect of His personality, love, and provision for humanity.

The name of the LORD is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe. - Proverbs 18.10

ELOHIM

“In the beginning God (Elohim) created the heaven and the earth.”    – Genesis 1.1

• El = Mighty or Strong
• Him = plural (Father, Son, Holy Spirit); Total Power and Might

This Christ of Christmas is the Creator, mighty and strong. he saw us in our mother’s womb. (Psalm 139) He createde us and has a special plan for every life.

JEHOVAH-ROHI

Jehovah my Shepherd (Psalm 23)

This Christ of Christmas is our Shepherd. He desires to lead us through paths of righteousness.

Jehovah-Rohi says:

“I am the Good Shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for his sheep.”  - John 10.11

JEHOVAH – M’KADDESH

Jehovah who sanctifies. (Exodus 31.13)

Sanctify = Consecrate, dedicate.

This Christ of Christmas desires to set us apart to walk in holiness, because He is our God.  

“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified.”   - 1 Thessalonians 4.3a

JEHOVAH – RAPHA

“I am the Lord who heals you.” – Exodus 15.26

This Christ of Christmas is our healer; body soul, and spirit.

“He himself took our infirmities, and carried away our diseases.”   – Matthew 8.16-17

JEHOVAH – NISSI

“The Lord our banner.” (Exodus 17.12b, 13, 15)

The Christ of Christmas is our banner (Victory)! Lift Him up.

“But I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all men to myself.”  - John 12.32

EL SHADDAI

“The One who  is more than enough.”

This Christ of Christmas is more than enough to meet our needs in every situation.  What seemingly impossible need can we bring Him?

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen   - Ephesians 3.20-21

 JEHOVAH – TSIDKENU

Jehovah Our Righteousness  (Jeremiah 23.5-6)

This Christ of Christmas is our Righteousness.

“God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”   - 2 Corithians 5.21

JEHOVAH JIREH

“The Lord will Provide” a sacrifice - Genesis 22.13-14

This Christ of Christmas is our Lamb of Provision! All may partake of His free gift of eternal life.

“Look, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!”   – John 1.29

Let Us Bow Before Him!